12 April 2021 [12:58 AM]

-

 

'I have never been a good friend, never gave my time to them. But what about the time I needed for me? I have always respected my personal space. Perhaps more than others! Why do I never feel like sharing my personal life with them? Why do I not ask for favour in trouble? Why? After talking about their sadness they felt relaxed but when I needed the mental support where were they? Oh yes, I never told them! I tried my best to keep them but how can I let others violate my priorities, my personal space, where no one is allowed, except me. Shall I ever be able to find that friend? Probably never.'

I was fussing over this when I lost my hold on my diary and it fell down. The old and dry rose petals, bookmark and some torn pieces of paper. 'Is this diary or some old treasure that is coming out so much?' I laughed over my own joke. I gathered everything up and placed them on their places. Torn paper in dustbin, bookmark in some random book and rose petals went back to diary.

How easily I decided their right place! If they would be living things, they might not like their new place. How much that rose has gone through before reaching in my diary? What did it feel when it was plucked from its plant, its home? Did that place ever felt like home? Is my diary final home? How can I ever come to know roses don't speak! How long torn paper had lived with bookmark before turning in to pieces? How much suffering it has gone through? Again, how can I know I don't even remember why did I tear that page apart. Bookmark also has its own story. But it stays on same place with different books like a human in a city with different people. And in the end it might end up like that torn paper or like rose petals.

Nobody knows, neither I nor you my dear reader. 



Comments

  1. Adi20 April 2021 at 23:24

    Life is a roller coaster ride. Just Do It ❤️❤️

    ReplyDelete
  2. Unknown20 April 2021 at 23:27

    Acha

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Nidhi katoch20 April 2021 at 23:34

      since I don't know the emotions behind your 'Acha', I'll take it as my article is 'Acha'. Thank you

      Delete

Post a Comment

My photo
Nidhi katoch
A silent observer in search of her TRUE HOME. If you like my writings, do comment and share... Views are extremely personal and are original writings of mine.

Popular posts from this blog

Token of memory

-
Image
I was lying on the bench with my head resting on your lap, when I captured this photo. It was the breezy noon of October.The aroma of tea from nearby tea stall filled our surroundings. The blue sky and the pale-green leaves of trees were making the view more beautiful. I mused how in childhood, we used these leaves as currency, which could buy every happiness in our small world.  The leaves were swinging along with the breeze. It seemed as if they wanted to flow with the wind. But they didn't not know that they wouldn't be able to go far after getting rid of the tree.  Only a few moments of flying in the air then they would fall to the ground and lose their being. I noticed one pale leaf was coming to us from its twig. But you held it in your palm before it fell and put it in one of the books that we had bought from the roadside stall.  I realised some leaves don't lose their existence but stay forever as a token of memory in the hearts of people, the way this photo will st
Read more

Speck of dust

-
Image
I was having my breakfast on the table by side of window. Sun rays were peeping inside from behind the tree. One or two rays felt pity on my loneliness and decided to come inside to give me company during my breakfast. I could see the thousands of dust particles in those sun rays. Few particles settled on my mobile screen, which was lying on table for not more than two minutes.  A little dust might have dissolved in coffee. I was constantly watching the silently dancing particles. Dancing or running? I don't know! I felt like I'm one of them, Speck of dust, dancing altogether yet alone. Dancing on the music whose lyrics are ineffable, rhythm which is lost in far hills, which has no intro and ending. I'm a speck of dust who's afraid she'll be lost somewhere in this loop named World.   I was distracted by the voice of kid outside on the street who was asking his friends to wait for him. He was on his foot while his friends were on bicycle. But when they didn't hea
Read more

Musings

-
Image
I was sitting on the wooden roof of the cafe, trying to comprehend the meaning of my life. I heard a human voice from the sky and looked upward. While paragliding people looked like birds flying in the sky, as if they own the sky. As humans we always want to fly, free and wild. To break my chain of thoughts and to amuse myself, I started observing others in the cafe. A group of teenage girls was occupied in gossiping. "Why can't they just sit and enjoy the scenery? ", I remarked. A man in his early twenties, with a camera in his hands, was clicking pictures of hills. " A fine, sunny day to take pictures, but what's the use of beautifying something that is already beautiful? " I said in my mind, "But that's not of my concern. I'm doing the same thing here judging others and ignoring beauty. " I could feel the sting of jealous and contempt in my thoughts.  Mid day sun was up and it's warmth melted the snow settled in my heart. Two childre
Read more

The Day We Met...

-
Image
I still remember the day we met. The sun was burning hot. But then clouds of heaven smiled over us. And they witnessed our meet. The angels behind the clouds showered their blessings. That day I embraced the silence to listen to your words, to embed those words in my heart like pearls.  Words that were not of worldly wisdom, but the words of freedom. Words of ecstasy soothed the silence of lips and melted my stormy soul. The words of your song even excited the birds. Wind of love was flowing and the fragrance of flowers scented the garden. We sat there for long hours. The sun reached below the horizon and mist covered the whole garden. Your lips kissed my forehead and bid me good bye. Then you lost in the midst of mist with a smile on your face. And there left a woman who had just experienced the eternal joy of love for the first time and the misery of separation from her lover.
Read more

Words

-
Image
 Sometimes words are angry upon you. They don't come to you easily. The more you approach, the more you try to persuade them, they run away from you like a child turns his face when he is angry upon her mother or like the tantrums of your lover when you tease him.  Sometimes they grow in your mind but when they reach on the gates of Great Paper they give up. They think they aren't ready yet, not fully prepared. They think or we!  Ah! How can you write such a thing? Who on earth is going to like it? And we don't put them even on paper which is our personal space.  Sometimes words come to us when we are on a ride, drive or may be in some shopping mall/ grocery store. We find them interesting and decide to write them, then they fly.  They flew to far land where neither we can reach nor our thoughts. Words, medium to communication but when everything ends we don't need them anymore, not for others, not for us. Then they just float in the air freely, without any arrangement,
Read more

Talking in between the Silence

-
Image
  "What's more heavenly than steaming hot coffee after spicy momos? " I asked my twin who was still waiting for her coffee to cool down a little. "Maybe a piece of cake! " She replied jokingly. After this talk, we kept quiet for a while. It was a nice day to sit under the sun. A perfect day to soak the warmth in our hearts which had been turned cold while walking among the crowd.  "Why are we sitting here?" "Because we are seeking escape." "Is it wrong to do?" "No." "So why does it feel wrong?" "Because we're trained to feel so." "Should we part our ways? " "We never need to part ways to do different things." "Are you trying to say we are right?" "I'm not saying we are right. But all I know is We are NOT wrong." I didn't know where was this conversation heading, neither she. We kept on talking for a while in that way and fell silent again. "Let
Read more

Connect me through Social Media